On Being Chronically Angry at Work

Dear Readers,

Currently Listening To
Pavement- Crooked Rain, Crooked Rain

How many times do I have to tell you that I need to find a new job? Liz is telling me that I should turn in a cover letter/resume at her place of business. Perhaps I will do that. Before I get into any further digressions, this is my horoscope from the Seattle Weekly. I feel that this is very fitting for me these days but I'm usually just a big shit talker year-round. Have I been offensive these past couple of weeks? I promise it was warranted if I was offensive.

(On a side note, you should really ask Liz to post her horoscope up. It is ridiculously accurate and amazing. )

Libra (Sept. 23–Oct. 22)

Ooh, snarky! Your silver tongue has taken on a surprisingly sharp edge of late. Usually you don't like to risk offending people to this degree, but I guess the pressure just built up to intolerable levels, and you had to let people have it, come what may. Personally, I like it. But this shift in your dynamic might require more attitude adjustment than some of your friends are capable of. They're used to the nonconfrontational version of you, and the person who's stepped forward, willing to make enemies instead of desperate to be liked by everyone, is someone they may not recognize. There comes a time for every Libra when you have to make a choice between being liked and sticking to your guns. For some of you, that time may come this week.

This horoscope is quite odd in the sense that there are relevant tangents to my life these days, mostly in relation to how much I hate work[ing]. However, I will not place the entire blame on work. Liz and Tim are also two of the biggest shit-talkers/silver-tongued ho-bags I know.

Liz informed me of a statistic where 1 in 4 people are chronically angry at work. The reason I mention this is because I believe that I fall within this demographic -when I stop to think about it, I really am chronically angry at work. There are a lot of reasons why I'm sure you can all list a few. If you're anything like me, don't work at a corporate coffee shop unless you like being "written up" (whatever that means), being closely monitored (regardless if a boss is there or not) or wearing a uniform. Because I have such a big problem with the uniform, my resistance and solitary mutiny exists in the form of not washing my uniform for months at a time. At work today, being chronically angry, my coworker asked me if I farted. I didn't but I'm sure my uniform, which hasn't been washed in weeks, emits a fart-like aroma. There has not been an intervention so far but I am sure it is coming. Perhaps I will throw trash on myself on purpose. Am I trying to get myself fired?

I wonder if I will still be the same type of person if I am actually happy with my job. I think some of my best material is a direct product of my chronic anger and frustrations. I think that, in retrospect, life is more interesting and worthwhile when you've gone through some tough times. In times of an impending economic recession, isn't it more conversationally appropriate to be self deprecating? What the hell am I talking about?

Ultimately, all I'm trying to say is that being bitter and depressed at work is not worth the minimum wage, shitty tips and cleaning poop off the toilet seat so I need a better job. I also need to find a better job so that I can invest in sweet Air Force 1's.

I am actually really tired so, as much as I want to write, I do not have the energy to continue. But, for precedent's sake, a list of things I wish I could be excused from-
1. Work
2. Chinese, Anthropology
3. Writing this English paper
4. Paying bills
5. Time constraints

Goodnight everyone. This was pointless. I wish I could see who reads this. I need an evaluation- questions, comments, suggestions?

--

Oh jeez, I tried. It's been too long. I'm sorry but I have to do this-

ENGLISH TEACHER OMG LSDJG!!fSGLKJSGSJLJGM#)@JF so cute.

If you didn't understand that, that was basically my feelings for him materialized in an undecipherable and unrelated string of letters and symbols. I am a poet.